****
It hadn't been a pleasant task and it took more skills than he readily possessed to get the villagers, two bulky and rather ill mannered men, to do as he asked. Yes, it required tact and denars. 'Amazing what a poor man will do to feed his family or fill his gullet with cheap ale.' Iolaus thought. He carefully supervised as the men entered the small house and carefully brought out Cyrene's body then, when funeral arrangements were determined, he once again found himself looking at the dark figure of his friend through the home's entrance. "Her body's being prepared for burial tomorrow morning." Iolaus inform Hercules, "I hope Xena is better by then. I'd hate for her to miss her own mother's funeral."
Hercules nodded, "We'll probably be up most of the night. She's still sleeping. We'll talk and I tell her what you said. One thing I did find is that Xena's troubles stem from something Cyrene told her before she died."
"Gabrielle pretty well figured that much out."
"It must have been an incredible revelation, whatever it was. Xena's mind isn't easy to shut down --."
Iolaus agreed, leaning his weight against a hand that rested on the outside door frame. "Did Gabrielle return yet with your supplies?"
"Yeah, she said she's going to the stables to pat down Argo and see that he's fed. Then, she's going off to bed. She has a room at the local inn."
"I'll go see how she's doing. None of this has been easy on her."
"Do that." Hercules said, in an odd-approving tone. "Then turn in yourself. You look like you need it."
"Take care, buddy." Iolaus turned from the door and heard it shut behind him.
*
"That's a good horsy." Gabrielle crooned to Argo as she brushed her creamy mane. "Such a faithful beast, you are. So kind and forgiving and Xena loves you so much ..."
"But not as much as she loves you." Iolaus announced his presence behind Gabrielle and was a little dismayed when she didn't immediately turn to look at him. Was there something hidden on her pretty face or was he just losing his touch?
"Xena loves a lot of things." she murmured.
An curious comment but Iolaus played along, "She loves warm summer days, butterflies, wheat fields and to write about her adventures."
"No, that's me." Gabrielle said, "On all four counts." and there was a hint of laughter in her tone. "And I love to swim and read and recite and ..." she trailed off, continuing to brush Argo.
Iolaus smiled and walked into the stall, touching Argo's soft nose while he watched Gabrielle work. "I like those things too -- except for writing. You can be the keeper of the scrolls." When she didn't respond, he said, "It will be all right, Gabrielle. I just talked with Hercules and he's sure he'll be able to have things straightened out by tomorrow morning."
"In time for the funeral." Her smile faded, "Good for him." She moved away, throwing the brush into an empty wooden bucket. The noise caused Argo to start but Iolaus' soothing touch quickly settled the beast.
Concerned, his eyes followed her and watched Gabrielle dry her hands with a lightly colored piece of cloth. Her back was to him. As a matter of fact she hadn't really looked at him since he stepped foot in the stable. "What's the matter? You seem angry or something." Iolaus asked and was blunt, "You act almost as if you don't want Hercules to help Xena."
Suddenly, and with a vehement toss of her blond hair, Gabrielle turned on Iolaus. "That's not it at all." She was stunned by the accusation, her eyes wide with shock that he might ever consider such a thing. "I love Xena and would want Ares himself to help her if he could." Then her voice faded a bit as she looked passed him, out of the stables open front entrance, out at the twilight of near evening. Her eyes clouded slightly, "I just wish ..." she sought the right words, "... she would have accepted help from me."
"Ahha." Iolaus had to grin at his own obtuseness. Of course, Gabrielle was feeling badly because her best friend didn't want her help but that of someone else, Hercules by name. She felt it a reflection on their friendship. Iolaus could relate, in a way. How often did he feel left out when Hercules gravitated to someone other than he for advice? Jason came to mind. Okay, maybe it didn't happen often. After all, he and Hercules grew up together and had always been best buddies. If not experiencing each other's triumphs and let downs, then hearing about them. "Gabrielle, I don't want this to sound like I'm sure it will ... but sometimes a person needs the company of someone other than a close friend. She needs someone she can talk to or, at least, commiserate with on an equal level?"
"You don't think Xena and I are equal?"
He cleared his throat. No, he wasn't going to stumble into one of those conversations. "I see things in you I could never see in Xena and visa versa." He continued when her expression softened and she appeared thoughtful, "Often times I see things in her that I see in Hercules and, in that respect, I think they are of one soul." Iolaus looked up into the lofts, trying to remember something someone once told him, "I heard a story once about how the world was at one time inhabited by people with two heads and four legs ..."
Gabrielle, who had been crouching near the brush-bucket and holding onto the cleaning cloth, stood straight and slowly turned to look at him.
" ... then the gods sent down lightening bolts to separate this being into two different people, male and female, and although they were parted they still shared the same soul and ...."
She took over, " ... those people, although separated, were always on a never ending search to find that other part of their soul ..."
"Yes, the story goes something like that." Iolaus chuckled a bit and looked down at the floor of the straw covered stall. He felt slightly embarrassed under her inquiring gaze.
"You were awake when I told you that story." She summed up, a little amused but not really amazed. "I thought you were unconscious but you really did hear me."
"Yeah, I heard it." He walked from the stall and closed the gate, "And I really think it relates to Hercules and Xena. They have a connection with one another that is clearly not of this world. I suppose Zeus thinks so too. That's why he made you send for us ... although I don't know why he didn't contact Hercules personally."
Slightly disappointed at his interpretation of her story, Gabrielle almost said what was in her heart. 'Are they the only two people you think that story relates to?' Her nerve gave out. "So, you're saying that Xena and Hercules have a special bond and I shouldn't feel embittered but be happy for them -- even though they barely see each other and we know they will never be together."
"How do we know that?"
"It's obvious that they are on different paths and ..."
"They're both people who want to do the right thing. I think they're paths are well connected."
She relented, the expression passive and unreadable. "Okay, you may have a point." Gabrielle whispered. Again, she wanted to say something to Iolaus but balked. "They've been close, I know ..." Then, she turned to him again and a genuine smile was present, "I can see why people like you so much."
"Hunh?" Iolaus was genuinely perplexed.
She walked over to where he stood, a familiar and droll gleam in her blue-green eyes. "You come in here, confront a really morose blond, say a few common sense things, and I immediately not only feel better but feel a little foolish for the negative things I was feeling in the first place."
Iolaus leaned casually against the horse stall and felt unaccountably reticent. "I think that has far little to do with me being tactful than you just being Gabrielle. You know what's in your heart and it just took a suggestion to bring it out. If I hadn't said something you would have eventually figured it out for yourself."
"You underestimate yourself, Iolaus." She tried to meet his eyes but was astonished to see the warrior-hunter purposely looking anywhere but at her. Bashful? Was he really embarrassed?
"I don't think anyone has ever said that to me before."
Finally, their eyes locked and they shared a warm moment of laughter. When it quieted Iolaus and Gabrielle just looked at each other for awhile. Oddly, it wasn't an uncomfortable silence. It seemed appropriate for her to gaze into his calm eyes and he to reach for her hair, to remove a small piece of straw that somehow got caught up in all of that honeyed blond. Then Argo stomped and whinnied, breaking the spell.
"Do you have a room?" Gabrielle asked.
For a split second Iolaus was stumped by the question and her meaning. Then, when he realized it was just general curiosity he said, "No, I'll check with the inn keeper. If there isn't anything I'll sleep out in the woods. It's not as if I've never done that before."
"Don't be silly. You can stay in my room. Xena and I were going to bunk together so why can't we?"
Iolaus grew uncomfortable, "Gabrielle ..."
She waved a dismissing hand, "It's a big room, Iolaus, with a bed and a chair and I trust you." With that, she took his hand and pulled him with her out into the night.
Iolaus whispered, "Sure, but can I trust myself?"
Once outside both pairs of eyes glanced over at the window facing the street to Cyrene's house. It was dark but a small light came from somewhere inside.
True to his word Hercules was still up, watching over Xena. The couple were probably eating the food Gabrielle had brought and talking. Hercules would, at first, only speak to her about their adventures together, how she was doing in recent times and then they would gradually get to the crux of the matter. Iolaus knew his friend well and admired his style. There were times he wished he could be as patient and diplomatic.
"Look!" Gabrielle pointed up into the night sky, "A falling star! Make a wish!" And like a child she closed her eyes and did as she told him. There was really no doubt what it was she wished for - Xena's good health - but the gesture - the innocent trust - touched Iolaus heart. It made him feel even more ashamed for the impure thoughts he'd been having about Gabrielle lately - even now as he saw the gentle play of moonlight over her fair skin and marveled at how the breeze about them picked up small wisps of hair from around her forehead and shoulders.
'She's a woman.' something told him, 'A lovely young woman who has wants and needs just like you. Don't let that sweet visage fool you!' Ares? Was that Ares telling him what he wanted to hear? 'Remember Cassandra, Eusia and Debius? Were they all that different than this pretty girl?'
Yes, they were much different than she. Gabrielle was ...
"I'm tired, Iolaus. Let's go to bed."
... putting him in a really bad position!
***
Gabrielle tried to convince him to lay on the bed with her. It was a big bed, made for two people, but Iolaus told her he would sleep in the chair. Before he closed his eyes he recalled the smirk of the inn keeper's wife and a male voice, probably someone behind the front desk, saying: "... and she seemed like such a good girl ..." as he and Gabrielle walked upstairs. She never heard it or if she did it never occurred to the bard that it was aimed in their direction.
'Or are you deluding yourself? Maybe she isn't as pure as you'd like to think ...'
Oh, that inner voice!
'Ares, leave me alone!' Then Iolaus fell to the floor.
"Iolaus!" Gabrielle was halfway out of bed, helping him to sit up in the chair, "Are you all right?"
"I'm fine - just fell asleep and ..."
" ... fell out of the chair." she finished for him.
It was a warm night and the window above her bed was open. Bright moonlight poured in on the couple, enough for Iolaus to see Gabrielle's humorous take on the situation. "Iolaus, you're being silly. Just lay on the bed with me and go to sleep."
He had to admit the offer was tempting and the bed looked soft and, after all, they were two adults who - although attracted to each other - were able to control themselves. Besides, he was tired and really in no mood for ...
Reaching up, Gabrielle took a hand full of his ragged vest and yanked hard, forcing him to fall on the bed. Once there Iolaus got in all the way and relaxed. This is nice, he thought, and safe. Sure, she's laying right next to me and she smells wonderful and I can feel her soft arm right against mine and ....
"Iolaus," Gabrielle's voice penetrated the semi-darkness, "Sometimes, when it's late like this, I think about that time when we first met - with Prometheus - and how I felt when you revived. It was so strange. I felt happiness because I knew you were going to be well but I was also afraid because I didn't know who used the sword to break Prometheus' bonds -- and I was afraid Xena might be dead."
"I thought the same thing about Hercules." Iolaus whispered back. He stared ahead, watching a shadow play across the bedroom wall.
He was also remembering her kiss of that time. The soft lips and gentle passion.
"Why did you fib when I asked you if you heard my story? I mean, while we were still near the cave and I was taking care of your wound?" She leaned over on her side and propped up just a bit, resting her head in her right hand. Her left hand reached out and rested on his vested chest.
Iolaus sighed. She wasn't going to make this easy. "I suppose I was worried about what it may lead to."
"Really?" She smiled in the darkness, playing with a loose thread she found on the garment. Or was it chest hair? Did Iolaus have chest hair? "You didn't want to get my hopes up? There was no real attraction for you?"
"No, not that. Far from that." he whispered. "If we went there I might have wanted you for my girlfriend or wife." He thought quickly, "You have to realize that I'm older than you. At least ten years."
"Closer to twelve or thirteen, I think."
"Okay." he interrupted with a little impatience, "The point being that difference can mean trouble. Bad communication and jealousy when a handsome young man looks at your younger sweetheart the wrong way ... and she seems to enjoy it."
"Oh Iolaus, that's absurd." she laughed and leaned in closer to him, "My father is nearly fifteen years older than my mother and my Aunt Jesiaha is five years older than my Uncle Borha. Age isn't that important. Not when two people care about each other. Besides," she snorted happily, "I'd probably have to worry about the pretty young girls going after you before the guys looked at me."
Oh, gods! She was so sweet and he wanted her. Why was she doing this to him?
'You're being a fool! She's right there. She wants you too! Take her you imbecile!' But this wasn't the right time. 'She's vulnerable. Xena's in a bad way and she's feeling lonely and wouldn't normally act this way if she wasn't afraid.'
"We're going to have a big day tomorrow, Gabrielle. Goodnight."
"Was I so young and virginal that you were afraid of taking advantage -- Really?" Her tone was bright but also slightly seductive.
There was no getting out of this conversation - "That's part of it." He attempted to wrap things up, "But I was also afraid that if I took another step I really might stay with you, if you'd have me, and leave Hercules to travel his journeys alone. He needs me by his side --" Then, and he didn't know why he suddenly felt the need to say it to her, "At least he did. Now, I'm not so sure."
"Why?" She leaned forward, hanging on Iolaus' every word, and quite enthralled with his wonderful profile. She moved a hand to touch his hair. It glowed in the semi-light and was engaging.
He really didn't want to go into it but she opened the door and he felt compelled to continue, "Ever since Alcamene died I've sensed a change in him. Hercules has Zeus on his side far more now than he ever did in the past. Maybe that's enough for him. He can do his good deeds and having a partner, someone to watch his back, isn't that important anymore. Not like it was."
"I don't think that's true. He loves having you travel with him. Your his best friend and you keep him from being lonely."
"Maybe, but a best friend is a far cry from someone he can share his love and life with."
She paused, thinking about what he said. "Are you thinking about Xena? Do you think they should partner up?" Her voice trembled a little. "Do you think they're thinking about it?"
He suddenly felt stricken. No, he hadn't honestly thought about Xena but obviously Gabrielle had. Iolaus turned slightly and raised his arms to embrace her, "I don't know what I mean. But just because Hercules has changed doesn't mean Xena will. She still needs you and your staff guarding her back -- no matter what it was she discovered from her mother. Or maybe even because of it. And no, I didn't really mean her in the first place -- although it wouldn't surprise me if some day they ..."
Gabrielle rested her head on his chest and gently felt the material of his wool vest with her hands.
" ... get together." Iolaus closed his eyes, suppressing a powerful emotion which threatened to overcome him. She was still so fresh and beautiful. He touched her hair and ran a careful hand down her back. She felt so good and holding her like this was almost ... natural.
"I left Xena once to marry Perdicus." Gabriell mumured, "If he'd lived, we'd probably be on our second child by now." She paused but there wasn't real sadness in her tone, just a sense of wonder. "Do you ever think about marrying, Iolaus?" Without realizing the effect it was having on him, she innocently placed a hand on his wrist and allowed her fingers to travel up the arm to his muscular shoulder. She followed the movement with her eyes.
'Gods, I can't believe this!' Iolaus wanted to scream, "No Gabrielle, I really haven't thought too much about marriage lately."
"Oh." Then, when it seemed she was going to pull away from him and lay down again on her side of the bed, Gabrielle said, "Iolaus, sometimes I think about you and me that way." Her fingers played with the stitching on his vest, "I know it's probably foolish but ..." but her voice was fading and she was drifting off into the fog of sleep.
What way? Married or ...? When she did not elaborate and he realized the girl had fallen asleep, Iolaus continued to watch the pattern on the wall, absorbing himself inside of it - hearing the last of her words in a soft echo.
'Let's go! You want to! Don't hold back!'
Control - Control - Control He brushed his lips across her forehead and closed his eyes.
'Iolaus, you are honorable but an utter idiot.'
****
When they came out of the small house no one expected Xena to look as good as she did. She was a bit pale, marginally spindly legged and required Hercules ear whisperings to keep her informed and emotions in check. Yet, Xena's hair was combed, her black leather warrior's outfit, with light armor, was in place and her astonishing eyes were clear. She even managed an iota of a smile for Gabrielle when the girl looked at her from across Cyrene's open grave.
At the conclusion of the funeral service Xena threw a wreath of grap leaves on her mother's coffin and watched, with a calm-cool expression, as the box was lowered into the ground, then covered over by earth. The mourners, friends of Cyrene's, filtered away. Some touched Xena's back and shoulders with compassion and others spoke lowly to her, wishing her well on her future adventures.
Iolaus, who hadn't a chance to speak with Hercules since he and Xena walked from the house, gave him an inquiring glance.
Hercules took in both Gabrielle and Iolaus with a mime of 'Later.'
"Rest in peace, Cyrene." Xena said, gazing sadly at the fresh grave. "There is a place in the Elysian Fields for someone as kind, loving and loyal as you."
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